Can I have your autograph?

I am sitting at a Starbucks in the Phoenix airport near some kind of football star. Guys keep casually wandering by in the hallway, reminding me of teenage girls trying to get a glimpse of a cute boy without being noticed. Then there are the sheepish looking guys who tiptoe up to him and say "I'm sorry to bother you..." To watch all of these people sneaking up to him is giving me the giggles, so in addition to a football celebrity there is a loon in the corner snickering at her computer.