We made it! One year!

Dear Grayson,

I wish I could upload the picture I took of you when I went to get you up on your birthday yesterday. Unfortunately my computer/internet connection/this website will not cooperate... it's funny to think that when you are old enough to read these entries that this technology will most likely be obsolete! Ah, the olden days. Anyhow, in this particular picture you are standing up in your crib, clothed in a gunny sack with hair like a rooster, squinty eyes and a loony-looking grin. I love it. I decided right then that I was going to greet you with a camera on your birthday every year until you lock me out of your room.

Happy birthday, my big boy. I am attempting (and failing) to make your birthday cake right now, since we are having some friends over tomorrow afternoon for appetizers and birthday cake. Once upon a time, I was a pretty terrific baker but this altitude has ruined that for me and while your cake may be pretty tasty, it will also be a little uneven looking. Sorry, pal. I tried.

We went down to see your Gram and Papa yesterday and you were pretty annoyed with us for putting you in the car for a two hour ride. You are usually pretty laid back but you whined and whined all the way down to Pueblo. We looked at each other and said, "Is this what other babies are like? Because this sucks!" I really don't know how I got so lucky. You are the easiest baby on the planet. We weren't sure what time to put you to bed tonight because your naps got so messed up today, so we opted for the regular time. You didn't complain, and I assumed you were sleeping until I heard you whispering to yourself and making clicking noises about a half hour later. Your attitude was along the lines of: "They want me to go to sleep? Huh. I'm not really tired. I guess I'll just hang out." Other babies might cry, but not you.

You are hilarious and you make me laugh a hundred times every day. You're just... silly, I guess. It's fun to see your personality emerging. Today you were in the back seat making car noises with the most bored, annoyed expression on your face. Your dad summed it up perfectly: "He looks like making that car noise is a job he's got to do."

You have decided that you are not interested in being fed all of a sudden but also have no idea how to use a spoon. You are standing but not walking, which totally threw me for a loop. I really thought you'd be walking by now! I don't think you have any new words since your vocabulary still consists of: dada, ta-da!, uh oh, wow. Every once in a while you'll surprise us and we'll look at each other and say, "did he just say...?" so I'm sure a bunch of new words are right around the corner. You will sign bird, more and all done, although you are sooo not interested in this whole signing thing. You know how to shake your head "no" to the point where you fall over, you can pat your head, pat your tummy, clap your hands and show me where your ears are. Just recently you have developed this interest in books and you will crawl over to your books and look at them for ages. You LOVE Archie and you always think he's playing with you when he's trying to get Charlie to chase him.

Your hair. Oh, your hair. I cannot believe how BLONDE and CURLY it is. It looks like we just took you to the salon to get a perm. In fact, we need to get it cut again. I was going to try to cut it myself but it's so unruly that I think I'd end up stabbing you or me in the process. I love it. Your eyes are still this murky greyish green and we are all wondering if this is it, or are they still changing? You (still?) have three teeth on top, two on the bottom. We have finally figured out that we have been battling eczema, so we are slowly figuring out how to deal with that problem (no scented detergent, no bubble bath, etc.)

You start "real" daycare on Monday and it hurts my heart to even think about it. It is going to be the crappiest day for me and I just keep reminding myself that it's temporary. Once you have a brother or sister we are doing the nanny thing again, so hopefully it will be just for a year. I hope I'm wrong, and that it turns out to be a wonderful thing for you. But I'll miss you- I'll miss hearing your shrieks and babbling, I'll miss coming out of my office just to give you a kiss in the middle of the day and I'll miss knowing you are safe at home. I'm annoyed that I'm being such a baby about this with all the misery going on around us right now (we are so lucky to be able to afford such a nice daycare in this crummy economy), but still...

I don't know how many times a day I think how lucky I am to get to be your mama!

love,
Mama