Dear Gray,
Dude, when did you learn to push my buttons so effectively? You are a total champ at it lately. We have had to have several discussions about "are you listening to me?" because although I know you hear me you have no interest in doing what I have asked. It's excruiating. I know that kids go through this phase of pushing limits but I don't seem to have the patience for it lately and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I yell, I'm sorry for putting you in time out, I'm sorry for just not being more patient. But... it is so hard!
Our day so far has gone like this: we get you out of bed and you want to look for a truck, or "five trains." Then you proceed to haul several trains, cars, a firetruck, etc into our bedroom where you then drive all of these items around the bed and torture the dogs. (Gone are the days where you'd collect your sippy cup of milk and just hang out on the bed watching cartoons while we tried to grab a little extra sleep.) You harrass me: "Mama, canna wanna milk? Whatchu doin? You gonna wake up? I have pomatoes in my ears? Where's my car? Dada where's the femote?" etc etc. Then you have a total freaking meltdown that is very likely hunger-driven... but you refuse to eat. We decide to head to the zoo and on the way there you quiz us to make sure we knew where we were going: "Is it this way? Dada, do you know where the zoo is? Where is it? Are we there? Are we gonna park in the parking garage? Where's that big truck going? Can we follow it? Pleeeease? What's that place? ("It's a church") What's a church about?" You are learning time concepts right now and you use tomorrow, yesterday and not yet in the same sentence to communicate that you went to the museum (which is next to the zoo) the other day. At the zoo you want to get out of the stroller but you don't want you walk- you want us to "hold you." You refuse to go on the merry-go-round and I drag Eli on there to show you that even a baby likes a good carousel. No dice. You look at us going round and round with worry, telling us to stop and get off. I force you to go on the choo-choo train (What's up with this sudden fear? You used to like the choo-choo!) and after a bit of drama and a short ride, you get off saying "I'm brave!" We buy you a green Icee and after 1000 reminders to hold it up and down to use the straw successfully you tip it and get sugary syrup all over your arms and shirt. We ride home in the car with me harrassing you all the way so you don't fall asleep. But now you're on to me- you keep saying "Mama, I'm trying to sleep!" while pretending to close your eyes. "Tickle me!" you demand. So I oblige. We arrive at home and you chase Archie into the house. Halfway down the hallway you realize you've been trapped and you start to wail "I WANT TO GO OUTSIDE! I DON'T WANT TO TAKE A NAPPY!"
Oh, Gray. We ALL need a nap at this point.
You have finally agreed with us that you need a big boy bed, so we are going to take that leap soon. You have started to sit on the potty with some success- right now I believe the tally is at four pees and one poop (!) this week. This month we have had a garage sale, which you loved ("Can I see your garage sale, Mama?"), and attended a picnic in a crazy hailstorm (you kept saying "I want to go home!") You are learning to torture your mama- we talk about how motorcycles are dangerous and then you tell me "I'm going to ride on a motorcycle, Mama!" just to hear me protest. Every night at bedtime we always tell you that you are a good boy and you inevitably reply around the thumb stuck in your mouth "what did I do?"
You may be exhausting, but I have never laughed so much in my life. You are the best.
Love,
Mama
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